"4. Write about your troubles. Keep a journal to record your fears, worries, and concerns. Studies show that writing about a negative experience for twenty minutes about three times a week can give you a sense of control over the problem and boost your body's immune function. Handwrite your worries away in a notebook or type them into a computer file. " -How to Reduce Personal Anxiety, http://www.allsands.com/Health/Alternative/reduce-personal-anxiety.htm

Sobrang na-toxic ako kanina. It's bad already that we have saturday classes, pero inextend pa nila! What's more, sobrang tinakot nila kami. Fortunately or unfortunately, OR (Operating Room) yung una namin shift, which turns out is the HARDEST shift in the entire nursing course. It's like a crash course on Surgery, as in crash course talaga (feeling mo mamatay ka na). OUr CI managed to squeeze at least a week's worth of lecture into 7 hours. What's frustrating is that hindi ako nakinig masyado kasi sobrang inaantok na ako. Then, next week, we'll have our return demos ( sort of practical exams) then immedietely after that, magiging scrubs na kami. Scrubs, as in scrub nurse during actual operations, with real people, real instruments, and real doctors. Scary talaga. A Scrub nurse, as i have painfully discovered a while ago during our lecture-slash-scarefest, is no joke. She is as important, and (should be) as skilled, as the surgeon. She could literally botch the whole operation with just one erroneous move. She could render the whole instrument set, no, the whole OR, UNSTERILE and delay what could be an emergency, a LIFE-saving operation. Having too much responsibility is my biggest fear.

I'll sleep na. Kanina pa dapat ako natutulog. Wish me luck.